Friday, December 7, 2012

Twenty-Five Songs the Ladies of New Directions Should Cover

So it's that time of the year for college students! 

It's time for finals.

If you're like me then you are probably cursing out all of your professor. You're spending it hunched over a textbook that you spent over a hundred dollars on but barely opened it during the semester. You stare at your oblivious professors who seem to think their test is the only one you will be taking and give you a term paper due the day of your final. You're contemplating dropping out and living a life on the road and dear God when was the last time I saw the light of day?

Or you're just procrastinating on the interwebs (like myself right now so I don't blame you guys) and you would prefer to finals just blow over and you get at least pass them all. 

And if you are also like me, music is your best friend during this turbulent time. 

So as most fans of glee tend to do, you hear a song that comes up on your iPod and are like "They should totally cover this song!" and then when they do several months later, you think that perhaps the producers of glee have all of their fans rooms bugged in order to figure out future ideas for the show.

 ...

Or that just could be my theory. It's more likely that the creators of glee may troll the internet. So in case of that somewhat likely event, many people have done a list like mine. 

A list of songs they would want glee to cover. 

However, I noticed that the lists are usually for the whole cast: male, female, and group numbers all meshed up together.

Also this is in no real particular order so yeah don't take the ordering seriously.

I, however, have to naturally complicate this. 

So I will be doing a series lists for the following:
1) ND girls (former and current minus Rachel)
2) ND boys (former and current minus Kurt)
3) ND group
4) adults (all inclusive)
5) show choir competition (Vocal Adrenaline, Warblers, etc),
6) New York (Kurt, Rachel, Brody, Cassie July, Isabelle Wright, Kurt's new love interest)


And since ladies do go first then let us look at the twenty-five songs that I want the ladies of New Directions to do (Unique is included in this because she identifies herself as female). 



25) Shake a Tail Feather sung by Tina Turner -New Direction Girls 

This song is just silly and fun.  It's powerful and you can dance to it. And well...these girls need to bond alright? I think that the much missed traditional mash-off competition (really we didn't get it this season) didn't give the chance for the newbies and the oldies of New Direction a chance to build together and having to work in a group. So yes. We need a solid girl power, dance number and what is more fun then this song?

Also can you just imagine Unique or Mercedes channeling their inner Tina Turner? Sexy.



24) Just a Girl by No Doubt - Quinn Fabray

 Okay. Remember when Quinn got all feminist for a hot minute back in Season One with "It's a Man's, Man's World" in episode twenty one "Funk"? Because I sure do. But instead we have Quinn at Yale letting herself be yet again defined by a man (thank you dear sweet baby Jesus Santana for pointing that out!), and a married man at that, but he is totally getting divorced. Right Quinnie? (He's not. Seriously he really isn't if you have ever seen a soap opera or a Lifetime movie.) 

So glee writers, here's what I want. I want Quinn to be scared off by Professor Smary McSmokesapipe's wife. Then I want her to take a Women's Studies class that kicks. her. ass. And then I want her to realize her own power and sing this song. Now I know Dianna Agron's voice isn't suited for rock. So strip this song down, rearrange it and let Quinn stand on her own two feet as a independent woman.

That felt good getting this off my chest.



 



23) Stupid Girls by P!nk - Marley Rose

P!nk will show up a lot on this list through virtue of her just being so goddamn awesome. Marley already covered her latest single Blow Me (One Last Kiss) on the show. (And side note: Wasn't it really funny to see one Glee's YouTube page: GLEE - Blow Me. Because I have similar sentiments toward the show sometimes as well. Also that and I'm secretly twelve.) Now with Melissa Benoist saying in a recent interview for TV Guide that Marley's fainting at Sectionals signals a real turning point in her eating disorder storyline.


Sooo with that in mind, I think after you know Marley going through therapy and really struggling with what she was doing to herself...I think she should confront it (and Kitty) with this song as like a final chapter of a book. For some reason, I oddly think this would be a really good closing song on the eating disorder story arc (yes Glee has discovered consistency!!!) when they do decide to close the book on it.


22) The One That Got Away by Katy Perry - Santana Lopez and Tina Cohen-Chang

This song will also appear on the Songs ND Boys Should Cover List as well. Despite myself having a deep dislike for Katy Perry...I can't help but like some of her songs. This one is a favorite in particular. I just like what the song is about really and instead of a guy mourning over the loss of a girl it's the opposite. 

So oddly enough I think that this would be an interesting combination. With the advent of Bram, it would make sense for Santana to sing it because Brittany has moved on. While for Tina, well I think part of her kind of really regrets breaking up with Mike.

Plus after "Shake It Out" in season three episode eighteen's "Choke", I really want the hear Naya and Jenna's voices together and I think this would be the perfect song for them.


21) I Feel the Earth Move by Carol King - Mercedes Jones or Unique Adams

The version that I really wanted them to use was sung by Mandy Moore. But sadly...I couldn't find it on YouTube. But the original is always the best. Truthfully, I just think that this song would just show off those big beautiful belts that Unique and Mercedes are quite capable to produce from those dynamic voices. 

I'm not really sure of the context where this could fit in. It could be that Mercedes is moving up from her being a background singer to a real singer  and this is her moment. Or it could be Unique meeting a guy who will treat her like the girl she feels she is on the inside.

Either way this song would suit either voice just fine.


20) Son of a Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield - Whichever girl falls for Joe Hart

This song is just...very sensuous and fun at the same time.  I think whichever girl the writers inevitably has falling for Joe should sing this to him at some point in the relationship. 

That is all.


19) Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson - Female on an end of a break-up this season

Glee is known for liking break-ups and make-ups and get-togethers in relationships. And truthfully...I'm surprised that Glee hasn't done this song yet.

"Since U Been Gone" is one of the best break-up songs of our time. It's a huge fuck you to whatever man or woman has done you wrong. This is the song you reach when you're done sobbing and eating ice cream for a week. 

This is a song that would kill on glee! I mean yeah Pitch Perfect did it this summer but...you can still do it too!


18) Girl Next Door by Saving Jane - Marley Rose

This song is perfect for Marley. And I will maintain that Taylor Swift's "You Belong With Me" was partially inspired by this 2004 hit. 

But what about this song describes Marley so well? It's about feeling plain and invisible and bit beaten down. Not being perfect or being Miss America (or in this case Rachel Berry) but instead just being yourself and accepting it as your place in life. 

Which I think would speak to Marley at this point in her life.


17) You Belong With Me by Taylor Swift - Kitty Wilde

Since apparently Kitty's main goal this season is to win back dated for a hot minute Jake at whatever the cost, I think she should sing this song. It is so wrong for her but I don't think lyrical content would really matter to Kitty.

Besides this is New Directions, you sing out your intentions and if you still want him then you need to be direct. Or hopefully you've grown a conscience since you know Sectionals, Kitty. But the song is still here just in case.


16) Mister Know It All by Kelly Clarkson - Tina Cohen-Chang

Tina is walking the fine line between being confident, sassy, and an outright bitch this season. Which is admittedly something that I like to see from her after her being in the background for so long. But in particular, she's been lashing out at Finn.

And it is a tradition for glee kids to strike out against their advisor, I can name several numbers that are basically fuck you Will Schuester (which hurts me as a Will fan). So, to make things even, why can't Tina continue that tradition with Finn?

I think this would be a perfect way to vent or shame. Because Tina and Finn haven't had a lot of interaction of their characters, so it would be something truly interesting to see what they can do with it.


15) Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae - New Directions Girls (past and present)

This song is just...very pretty and mellow and sweet. I think the ladies of New Directions could do something fun in a different way.  

Plus I would love to see old members and new members sing on stage and what better way to bond then music? So this song could just be something...very cool if done right and with the right atmosphere and situation.

Maybe Spring Break? Fingers crossed!


14) My Happy Ending by Avril Lavigne - Tina Cohen-Chang

This would have been perfect for Tina to sing in episode nine of season four "Swan Song"! Dude after the seniors getting their happy endings in season three last year now the new seniors get jack?!

Unfair! So Tina should have done in like song or something. Especially after three years of being in the background to the divas of the glee club: Santana, Mercedes, and the biggest of all Rachel. She deserved this chance. Granted it's about a broken relationship but wasn't everyone in "Swan Song" so kind of broken? New Directions was broken in their bond because their season was over.

And for the seniors it was the end of their last one. So much for their happy ending.



13) Because I'm Awesome by The Dollyrots - Brittany S. Pierce

 Brittany's voice shines when she has this huge pop songs that she can dance too: Beyonce, Ke$ha, Britney Spears... She absolutely shiiiines with these songs. And she does talk about how awesome she is sometimes so why not sing about it?

The song is totally like Brittany bragging about how awesome she is and all the reasons are very Brittany like: she's a leader, a winner, and she's cleaner...cuz she's awesome! 

I think this would be something really funny to watch and I can just imagine the choreography to this and oh boy it would be hilarious.



12) (You Make Me Feel) Like a Natural Woman by Aretha Franklin - Unique Adams

Again for when Unique gets a boyfriend. Since she is transgendered and identifies she as female, Unique would very much want to feel like a natural woman. So if she meets a boy that makes her feel as such she would (hopefully) automatically go to this song.

Unique should reach for this songs that show off this big, juicy glory notes that just reach from the stage and hit you full force in a wave of awe and emotion.

This girl is made for this song.



11) Only in New York from Thoroughly Modern Millie - Santana Lopez

Inevitably, Santana Lopez will make her way to New York City. Honestly? It's just a matter of when this will happen. So...I think when she does make her way this should be the song she sings on her way there.  Because this song is about the dream of New York but it's delivery has to be slow, smokey and sensuous which Santana embodies perfectly. It's all in the delivery here.

Plus just picture Santana arriving, stepping off the best and getting this huge grand New York song moment.

Girl definitely deserves it.


10) Halfway Down the Stairs by The Muppets - Brittany S. Pierce

This one is a nice little tune from childhood. Now for the most part I think that Brittany's voice should stick with bubbly pop songs but I think that "Halfway Down the Stairs" fits her character well. It's a simple little song about being caught not wanting to go one or the other. And I think it would be interesting to use this song to explore her feelings of loving both Sam and Santana.

At one point in time this is something that Brittany will face and I think this song will be a nice haunting little tune (especially if they use the Amy Lee version) to only enhance her feeling.


9) My Boyfriend's Back by The Angels - The Unholy Trinity

Okay I know earlier that I went on about Quinn having to be her own independent woman and standing on her own two feet. And I still stand by that. However, I love it when The Unholy Trinity do the songs in the style of the sixties girl groups. And no song is as iconic as "My Boyfriend's Back", at least to me anyway.

Plus it's much more high energy than the more mellow covers of "Say Little Prayer" or "Come See About Me" and it will also really allow a chance for Heather's and Naya's voices to shine alongside Dianna's. I think given a chance this could be an awesome number.


8) Let's Hear It For the Boy sung by Jana Kramer - Marley Rose 

Now the Marley songs that I've chosen so far are about her path to recovery and battling her eating disorder. But...this is tradition in New Directions! She and Jake are a couple now (kind of? They are right?) and well as a couple she needs to sing a love song to him.

Not just any love song but one that will build him up. Jake does have some issues about himself and I can see Marley being a supportive girlfriend and giving encouragement to her man.

Nothing is as great as this revamp of the eighties classic "Let's Hear It For the Boy" by Denise Williams. I don't know why I like this version more (even though 2011 Footloose sucked) but it feels fresher with a bit of a country rock edge that I think would be fun for the show to do.  


7) Mamma Knows Best by Jessie J - Unique Adams, Marley Rose, Santana Lopez and Mercedes Jones

A collaboration between the mentees and the mentors! 

Jessie J is definitely one of the most fun people out in the music scene and her voice and the big brassy music here would just only make all four of these ladies own that stage! Like Santana and Mercedes giving their mentees a lesson in confidence and strut and they use this song to help. 

It would just be epic for all four of them to show off their belting and sass.


6) Diva's Lament (Whatever Happened to My Part?) from Spamalot - a New Directions diva

This song may have to do some tweaking ala Kurt's version of "Rose's Turn" in season one episode eighteen's "Laryngitis" but it would be a hilarious song. 

I hear that glee may do a diva episode (but that could RM trolling on Twitter again) in the future so I hope that amongst the many divas in the episode they throw this number in. Glee does have a hit or miss track record with them being self aware but I think it would be hilarious if one of the New Directions' divas take a stab at this number.

Especially since some of our divas are hiding on us this season in various parts of the country.


5) U + Ur Hand by P!nk - New Directions Girls

Okay seriously glee we need a P!nk tribute episode. Because seriously? No woman rocks as hard in the pop world as P!nk and I love her for it. So where does "U + Ur Hand" fit into this season?

Um well sometimes the boy go into the territory of not respecting the women. So this could be a great f-you to the boys. Especially if we have couples this time and have their girlfriends be like all kick ass and sexy and dancing and then being like 'yeah you're still in trouble with me dude'. 

Plus nothing brings people together like a giant screw you song. I'm going out and having fun with my friends.


4) Who Says by Selena Gomez and the Scene - New Directions Girls

Every list needs a good love yourself song. 

And out of all them we got "Firework", "Born This Way", "Skyscraper"...I like "Who Says" the best. I was thrilled with the cover of the only other Selena Gomez song I like "Love You Like a Love Song" because it worked well with Santana's smokey voice. Now the main reason I like "Who Says" is that it gets to direct to the message of these power, feel good, love yourself songs. 

Really who honestly says you're not perfect? A lot of people may say that but...it only matters when you give them the power to so just love your beautiful self. 

I think this would be a lovely sentiment for the New Direction girls to sing. Maybe like Marley's eating disorder is made public and they all feel bad for putting so much of the blame on her and sing this in support of her? Or maybe they just need a good girl number and nothing is as sweet, simple and loving as this one.


3) Wannabe by The Spice Girls - New Directions Girls 

You need to love the girl/boy bands of the nineties. Seriously this is a tribute episode I eagerly await. They're just so cheesy and feel good and dancey. Why hasn't this happened yet? 

"Wannabe" by The Spice Girls ruled my childhood. This is the song I sang with my best friends in high school at a senior class dinner (in front of the whole senior class on karaoke). This is the song I listen to for a smile after a hard day. So why wouldn't I want the ladies of New Directions to cover this song? It doesn't have to be for legit number have another ND girl sleepover and just have them singing and dancing around someone's bedroom to it. (It'll be much better than that Sandra Dee mess.) 

What else can I say but...do it glee and don't eff it up!


2) Speechless by Lady Gaga - Marley Rose and Tina Cohen-Chang with backup from the New Directions Girls

Lady Gaga and glee go together like peanut butter and marshmallows and chocolate sandwiches. It should be so bad but it is soooo good. 

So glee has covered a lot of Gaga songs some to better effect than others (my least favorite being "Poker Face"). So I do understand that people may tire of the Mother Monster's songs appearing on the show. 

But the thing is...all of her songs are her more dance numbers (you know except the mash-up of You and I/You and I but there is a trend here). 

"Speechless" is my favorite Gaga song of all time. Hands down it is the perfect powerful ballad. Especially when Gaga just does it on a piano. 

So for the leads I choose Marley and Tina because I feel out of the current voices they would marry well with this song the best. The both have power and a nice deep richness to their voices that will definitely make it soar. 

Context? I'm not sure the context but...well whatever the context it will be interesting.


1) One Girl Revolution by Saving Jane - New Directions Ladies (former and current)

This song has to be done in some capacity. I don't care if you have cutaways to various places or whatever. But this song is all about female empowerment. This song is the song I play when I am glad to be a lady.

This song has to be song by former and current women of New Directions. I want this song to show them feeling powerful in their careers, in school, in whatever. I think this would just be the most perfect song to cover.

I mean just listen to it! You can already hear all of the ladies of New Directions singing!

And well that's it. Twenty-five songs that I would love to see the ladies of New Directions perform. 

(Remember Rachel is going to done in the New York list just to make it fair.)

NEXT ON THE GLEE REWATCH PROJECT: Either another list like this or something Christmas-y since I'm getting into the season spirit. 

NOTES: So what do you guys think? Are there any songs you feel like have been left out? Which song for what lady or ladies of New Directions and why this song?

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER! @GleeRewatch

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